Speed and Happiness at MOS Burger

While Japan is home to one of the world's most prized native cuisines, I have no shame, not a shred siree, in admitting the pure unadulterated joy I get from the sheer abundance of fast food ideas borrowed from the big bad West, moulded and significantly amplified.

"The Taste of Happiness, Everyday, MOS Burger" says the sign. Damn right. Once upon a time, Malaysians enjoyed local presence of MOS Burger. As we did racial harmony and meritocracy. Alas, our happiness was short-lived for they pulled out, leaving us only with inferior interpretations of fast food for an industrialised nation. Come back, you hear, come back!!

We arrived at Tennoji station in Osaka one morning, famished for something traditionally Japanese like soba or onigiri, but we hit the MOS Burger outlet that greeted us right after we got off the subway. I went for the Kakiage Rice Burger and it hit the spot. There is something so right about that rice in the morning, lightly browned and crisp, sandwiching a juicy, flavourful vegetarian patty.

My lovely sister Kah Bee discovered Green Tea Latte for the very first time this particular morning (she resides in NZ and abhors Starbucks). She's not looked back since, and unfortunately, resigning to the annual visit to Starbucks in Auckland to get her fix.

She enjoyed her Shrimp Cutlet Burger, but look, who wouldn't?? Tell me you don't want to take a chunky bite out of this beauty first thing on a winter morning?

We went back to MOS a couple more times over the course of our trip in Japan. During the retail slumber period of the New Year, I dug into the Kinpira (Burdock Root & Carrot braised in soy) Rice Burger for a late breakfast. Wrapped in fresh nori, this instilled HOPE in 2010.

Of course, it's not all dietary fibre that makes fast food legit in Japan. They also make first-class comfort feed like fried chicken, in the form of the MOS Fried Chicken Cutlet. Feeling a little low about starting another year of failings and wailings? This will have you covered.

I am not sure what it takes for the franchisee to wake up and smell the damn green tea latte, but Malaysia needs its MOS! Over and out!

"Here's looking at you, Fat Kid", hollers Popeye's, Mid Valley

I've often been known to pooh-pooh fast food, asserting preference instead on the plethora of tastier, cheaper and often more nutritious finds that we are fortunate to find in our great, invasion-friendly motherland.

I am, however, not always this way. Deep inside me seethes an ongoing battle between my present-day disposition and the pervading shadow of the insecure, overweight and defeatist kid of yesteryears, who preys on the comforts of deep-fried junk.

Some days, the fat kid wins. Such as this harried working day, walking past the mint Popeye's outlet on Mid Valley's LG floor.

Vicky W goes for the 3-piece Chicken Tenders & Biscuit. All batter, not much flavour, she says. The biscuit is extremely agreeable though, even beyond whiny adolescent's tastebuds. Soft, savoury, more dense and less buttery than a scone. For a couple more of this, being in frequent company of last few standing kids to be picked for P.E. teams don't seem so bad!

The set comes with coleslaw & mash. Draws inevitable comparison to Colonel Sanders' version and Popeye's wins hands down.

Mash with gravy that's more chicken than the chicken tenders themselves. It's the kinda quiet triumph that the fat kid sometimes enjoys from busting clownish moves on the dance hall at the social and making the cool kids laugh.

I settle for the Chicken Sandwich, which at least offers some token slices of tomatoes and lettuce in between power-packed grease and carbs. OK, not the best the fat kid has had (and she has had MANY such burgers) but it isn't too bad either, given the other choices in the area.

The Cajun Fries are extra crispy and very tasty, sealing the deal and grease quota for weeks. The sort of thing that makes one forget the horrible awkwardness of the first slow dance with boy crush (Where do the arms go, the fat kid wails, round the waist or round the neck?)

I hear the Fish tenders are something else here and I am tempted. With this in the vicinity of work, I suspect Fat Kid will have more internal battle victories in coming days.